Challenge or Destiny?

Since August 14th, I have been challenging myself to become healthier, stronger and leaner.  I began the ultimate 100% clean eating plan… Whole30! Today is day 41 of my challenge.  It is one of the hardest thing I have done in my 49 years of life.  The challenge came about when I realized that I have been comfortable being average.  Why? Life can throw many things at you and you adjust; however, sometimes you are just happy to not be in panic ready mode.

I like to think of my plight this way…

Football fan? Sorry… soccer fan?  If so, you will understand this imagery… I see everyday like it is my own football match… I am the manager and I must have RIGHT formation, the BEST possible players I can afford, and I must be trusted to do my job to the BEST of my ability so I can BEAT ManU (doubters), Chelsea (food-pushers), Man City (sugar), Arsenal (grains), Newcastle (legumes) and Tottenham (dairy) so I can be BACK in the Champions League (the best shape and fitness)!

Hence, understanding my club’s motto… You’ll Never Walk Alone!

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Obstacles

No one prepared me for what I have experienced this past week! My youngest daughter had a knee reconstruction surgery better known as ACL and meniscus repair. It was very easy to have a MRI to determine what needed to be repaired. It was easy to schedule a routine second opinion. It was relatively easy to decide on the surgeon. Better yet, the date of surgery was penciled in on a business card that I could easily transfer to my Google calendar. We were all set. Everything had essentially been taken care of and all I simply had to do was wake up and take my daughter to the very convenient surgery center at 5:30am to finally begin her road to recovery.

Then… It hit me. My 17 year old daughter would be undergoing major surgery and I need to be concerned with her being put to sleep, reactions with the medications, what kind of support I will be strong enough to offer (become jello around needles/doctors/wounds etc.) and simply what do we do next. We have never had surgeries before. We have been blessed with health and we simply don’t get sick. What should I expect? Oh no… I will have it rely on others opinions, suggestions and decisions!

It happened… I am in full melt-down mode. Wait! I forgot to read my “Jesus Calling” daily devotional, forgot to let the family know the times of surgery, learned that my disconnected ex-husband would be meeting us at the surgery center and I did not eat or drink anything after midnight so to not tempt my daughter! You get the picture?

I drove my daughter to the surgery center, earlier than expected, checked in, paid my expected co-pay, settled into my waiting room make shift desk and proceeded to login into the FREE WIFI. I was prepared, confident and calm just like my devotional prompted me.

Door opened and “Stock” was called out. Here we go. My daughter was calm, polite and quite charming. The nurses, staff and doctors were terrific. My ex-husband blended into the walls and I was blown away by the sense of peace the consumed me. The process was beginning and I had all the confidence in the world in everyone and everything around me. Wow… No worries. What a feeling!

I say my goodbyes with a little tear of confusion, walk gingerly to the waiting area, grab a cup of coffee and then…my backpack slides off my arm jiggling the coffee enough to spill over my hand and onto my pants. I quickly pat up excess coffee and attempt to make it to the desired seat in the waiting room and my ex-husband sits in MY seat! A sign that i chose to pretend it was not important. Settled into a seat next to the wall and proceed to login to the FREE WIFI so I can begin my day with my dream morning online experience. WIFI did not work and desk staff only have posted the password code for the day on the wall but have no understanding of the workings. Of course, I can use my poser iPhone. I had one bar reception and for some reason the battery decided it was time to surge for no apparent reason. Unconnected but still holding on to the hope I can watch a WordPress tutorial or catch up on my Google reader. My ex-husband, whom has little to no understanding of the value of the Internet, has flawless Internet access and an iPhone! Why? Just another sign that I need to ignore. Getting harder… Surgery center phone rang and a pre-teen answered the phone as if was HER BFF was calling. No, instead it was hear “Stock, that is not my name” then hanging up the phone. I could not get to the child and phone fast enough because of my seating arrangement, the enormous amount of junk I brought with me to causally work on during the procedure and my remaining coffee. When I finally was able to get out of my suffocating web, prevent me from worrying shelter, I walk around as if I have a real pressing task at hand. Thank God, my cell phone alerts me to a text. My partner has gives me a great distraction! He reminds me to read my devotional, talks to me about minor creative changes we were trying to resolve on our new WordPress site ,injects some humor and allows me to feel in useful! That’s it. I need to feel useful. After I toying with all the additional, ridiculous, odd but humorous incidents of the day, I realize and wonder why today and these obstacles?

I can tell you that my 17 yr. old daughter has survived the surgery, mastered the crutches, simply is the best patient ever and WE are going to be stronger for it.

Until… The insurance company … I will just say… Expect obstacles!